How to Deal With Gaslighting at Work

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Gaslighting happens when you feel like you have fallen prey to someone or something that is using their manipulation tactics to undermine your sense of self-worth. It’s a form of psychological abuse and can leave you questioning your own sanity.

But gaslighting isn’t just happening at home. Bosses, friends, acquaintances, and co-workers can all be guilty of gaslighting you at work. This can make it hard to know what to do if you are experiencing this kind of behavior. If you suspect that you’re being gaslighted at work, here are some tips on how to deal with it.

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How do you destroy a gaslighter at work?

You can’t. He or she will always be there. But you can make sure they don’t have the power to hurt you anymore. You can take back control over your own life, but only if you’re willing to make some changes in how you do things at work.

First off, recognize that gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse, and it’s not okay for anyone to treat you that way. Gaslighters are extremely manipulative, so it may be difficult for you to recognize when they’re doing it. But if you pay attention and listen to yourself, it will become obvious.

Gaslighters will constantly try to make you feel like there’s something wrong with you. They do this by pointing out all of your flaws and failings while simultaneously ignoring or downplaying their own mistakes.

You may find yourself constantly apologizing to them for things that aren’t even remotely your fault. Gaslighters will also try to make you feel like you can’t do anything right. They may constantly point out things that you could have done differently or better, even if it’s in a very subtle way.

When someone says something like, “Why didn’t you just come over earlier?” or “You should have called me back sooner,” that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with the way that you acted—it means that they would have preferred for things to go differently.

What is the best way to respond to gaslighting?

One of the best ways to deal with gaslighting at work is by setting boundaries. This means being clear about what you will and won’t do and saying so if something is too much for you. If a task feels overwhelming or puts too much pressure on your time, don’t feel bad about saying no.

Likewise, if something seems like an easy win—like someone asking if they can take over an existing project—don’t feel bad about saying yes. Though, keep in mind that this might be a step towards feeling more confident about other tasks.

It’s important not to let yourself get caught in cycles where there are certain tasks that seem impossible because they’re too big or because they’re scary; don’t allow yourself to hit a wall when trying new things out because it could make them seem impossible later on down the road. As long as we set boundaries early enough, everything should work out fine.

How do you turn the table on a gaslighter?

This can be tricky, but there are a few things you can do. First off, you have to acknowledge the gaslighting and call it what it is. Saying something like “This is not normal” will help demonstrate that you know what’s going on and that you won’t accept it any longer.

Second, you can try to shift the focus back to the gaslighter’s behavior. By doing so, you are reminding him or her that what they did was wrong and not letting them off the hook so easily.

Finally, you can try to get the gaslighter to own their behavior by asking them questions like “What do you think happened here?” or “How do you think I feel?” These are great ways to get them thinking about what they did and how it made others feel.

How do you outwit a gaslighter?

There are a number of ways to outwit a gaslighter. The first step is to recognize that they are doing it in the first place. Gaslighting is so subtle and pervasive that it can be difficult to realize when it’s happening, especially if you don’t know what to look for.

Once you figure out what your gaslighter-in-chief is up to, you can start strategizing how best to deal with them. Here are some tips:

  • Don’t give them an audience. If they want to gaslight you, ignore them. Leave the room or hang up the phone if they try to call you while you’re with someone else; don’t let them see that they are getting under your skin.
  • Ask questions. This is a great way to bring out their inconsistencies and show how ridiculous their claims are. For example, if your boss says that you didn’t finish a project because of time constraints but there were none, then ask why that is so important for him/her to say now when it wasn’t before.
  • Don’t apologize. This is a common mistake people make when they are being gaslighted. You shouldn’t apologize for anything because it gives them power over your emotions.

How do gaslighters react when confronted?

Gaslighters dislike being challenged, so they’re likely to react defensively when confronted with the truth. They may try to shift the blame back on you or accuse you of having an overactive imagination.

They might also try to turn the tables, claiming that you’re the one who is wrong or crazy. Gaslighters will often deny that they said or did anything hurtful, even if there are witnesses who can confirm otherwise.

They may try to make you feel guilty, or they may try to make you feel like there’s no point in trying to get along with them.

Although gaslighters are difficult to confront when they’re in their manipulative mode, it’s important that you don’t let them off the hook too easily. It can be tempting to just let things go when someone is being mean or unfair, but doing so only reinforces their behavior and allows them to continue with it.

Gaslighters are all around us, and they’re not just limited to romantic relationships or family members. They can be coworkers or bosses who try to manipulate you into doing things that benefit only them, and they can also be complete strangers who try to take advantage of your kindness.

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If you’re being gaslighted at work, there are things you can do to protect yourself. The first step is recognizing what’s happening and setting boundaries for yourself. Second, talk to the person who is gaslighting you so they know that their behavior is not acceptable.

Finally, keep a journal of everything that happens between you and your gaslighter to avoid future misunderstandings.

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