How to Deal With a Boss That’s Picking on You

How to Deal With a Boss That's Picking on You
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It happens to everyone at some point. It can be very stressful if you’re being picked on because of race, gender, age, religion, sexual orientation, disability, or something else. And sometimes, it feels like no matter what you do, nothing seems to change.

“I’m going to get fired,” you might say. Or you’ll try to ignore it. But eventually, you’ll start feeling bad about yourself.

You don’t have to let it go on forever. There are ways to stand up for yourself without hurting your relationship with your boss. Here are four tips for dealing with a boss that’s picking on you:

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1. Create a written record.

If you feel uncomfortable talking about the situation, write down everything that happened and keep it in a safe place. This way, if anything changes, you’ll still have proof.

For example, if you were called into a meeting where someone was making fun of your accent, take notes immediately after the incident, so you remember exactly what happened. If you want to ensure you remember everything important, use an app like Evernote to save all your notes.

When you’re ready, talk to your manager about the issue. Be honest and tell him how you felt when he made his comments. Ask him why he said those things and ask for help changing the behavior.

2. Understand the concerns and communication style of your superior.

Your boss may need to realize that he’s treating you unfairly. He could simply be having a bad day. So before you confront him, consider whether there’s another reason for his behavior. For example, is he frustrated by the workload? Is he trying to teach you a lesson? Does he think you’re too sensitive?

If you can figure out what’s behind his actions, you’ll know how to respond appropriately. Then, you won’t need to worry about getting in trouble.

Also, pay attention to how your boss communicates. Do you notice any patterns? Are certain words more likely than others to trigger negative emotions? If so, avoid using them.

Finally, understand that your boss will probably react differently depending on who he’s talking to. Some people are better listeners than others. So if you find yourself in a similar situation again, try asking different questions or speaking to other team members.

3. Take the high road.

Sometimes, even though you’ve done everything right, your boss doesn’t seem to care. In these situations, you might feel tempted to give up. Don’t!

Instead, focus on your strengths. Think about all the times you’ve accomplished great work despite difficult circumstances. Use this knowledge to build confidence and remind yourself that you deserve respect.

Remember that your boss has his problems. Even if you’re upset, try to put yourself in his shoes. What would you want someone to do if they treated you the same way?

Don’t let anyone make you feel less than others. Instead, look for opportunities to show off your skills and abilities. You’ll earn respect from your colleagues and your boss when you do.

4. You did nothing wrong, so don’t worry.

Even if you didn’t say or do anything wrong, some bosses may still treat you poorly because they believe you should have behaved differently.

In these cases, you can still learn something from experience. For example, you knew that you shouldn’t interrupt your boss during meetings. Or you may have realized that you need to speak up more often.

Whatever the case, you can use this information to improve your performance next time. And if you’re lucky, your boss will eventually come around.

5. Honestly evaluate the situation.

After you’ve tried to resolve the problem with your boss, it’s time to evaluate the situation. Was it worth it? Did you get anywhere?

You can move on if you decide that the conversation wasn’t productive. But if you find a solution, you can share it with your boss.

You can also explain why you decided to keep quiet. Maybe you thought that saying something would only make things worse. Or perhaps you were afraid of being labeled as “difficult.” Whatever the reason, tell your boss exactly why you chose to remain silent.

Then, ask for feedback. Ask your boss what he thinks you should have said or done. Listen carefully to his response. This will help you determine whether you handled the situation correctly.

6. Talk to your mentor or a career or personal coach.

If you’re having trouble dealing with a challenging workplace environment, there are many ways to find help. A career coach or mentor could work within your organization or external to your organization. If you don’t know anyone like that, you can always do some research online to find people who offer coaching services.

You can also consider reaching out to a professional counselor or therapist. They can provide support and guidance while helping you cope with life’s stressors.

Finally, remember that you’re not alone. There are plenty of other people who have dealt with similar challenges. So reach out to them for advice and encouragement.

7. Observe the Workplace

You might notice certain strange behaviors when you start working at a new job. After all, you never saw those actions when you worked at your previous company.

But over time, you’ll begin to recognize patterns. These patterns will give you clues about how your coworkers behave and interact with one another.

For example, if you notice everyone talking about their weekend plans, but no one goes home on Friday night, you won’t want to work late every week.

Similarly, if everyone seems to be getting along well, but you rarely hear any positive comments about coworkers, you should avoid spending too much time with them.

It’s important to note that even though you may think you understand the dynamics of a particular office, you may not. Your observations may be based on limited sample size.

So before making assumptions, take a step back and observe the workplace. Then, compare your findings to your expectations.

8. Don’t waste your time thinking about what a bad boss you have.

The last thing you need to worry about is your current boss. Instead, focus on yourself. Think about your strengths, weaknesses, skills, and experiences. And use this information to figure out where you can improve. This way, you’ll be able to deal more effectively with future bosses.

Remember: It’s not your fault that your boss treats you poorly. But it doesn’t mean you can’t change things. Now that you’ve learned how to handle difficult situations, you’ll be better prepared to deal with others in the future.

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9. Consider the circumstance an educational opportunity.

As you learn from past mistakes, you’ll become a stronger person. And because you’ll be able to identify the warning signs of a toxic boss, you’ll be able to act accordingly.

In addition, you’ll gain valuable insight into how to handle similar situations in the future. So instead of feeling sorry for yourself, try to look at the situation as an opportunity to grow.

And finally, you’ll be able to change your behavior. For instance, if you realize that you tend to get defensive whenever your boss criticizes you, you’ll be able to control your emotions.

By taking these steps, you’ll be able to turn your negative experience into a positive one.


If you are dealing with a toxic boss, don’t let him drag you down. Instead, follow the tips above. By doing so, you’ll be able to respond appropriately to his behavior.

And by responding appropriately, you’ll be able to help yourself feel less stressed and more confident. Ultimately, you’ll be able to achieve success at work.

If you find yourself being picked on by your boss, there are a few things you can do to diffuse the situation. The most important thing is to remain professional and keep your cool. If the problem persists, you may need to go above your head or look for a new job.

But don’t let a difficult boss ruin your career – use these tips to deal with them and come out ahead. And if you’re looking for a new opportunity because of a bad boss, contact our expert resume writers. We’ll help you put your best foot forward so you can land the job of your dreams.

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